Most relationships are easy in the beginning. You’re in love; the differences between you are endearing; your future looks promising. The connection feels safe and supportive.
Over time, however, your perceptions of the relationship often change. Partners disappoint; you don’t always feel understood or appreciated; the relationship, once pleasurable, feels painful.
Often at these points, partners do one of 3 things:
- They argue a lot but don’t resolve anything.
- They withdraw and avoid one another.
- They decide to “throw in the towel” and end the relationship.
The good news is relationship problems don’t always mean that the relationship is not meant to be. They simply mean that you need to take steps to get the relationship BACK ON TRACK.This is where couples therapy comes in. Whether you need help resolving old issues, coping with a relationship crisis such as infidelity, or moving toward a new stage in your relationship, couples therapy can make a difference.
Here are some of the common issues that arise:
- Communication problem: “My partner doesn’t listen or understand what I’m saying.”
- Trust issues: “There’s been an affair. I’m not sure I can get over this.”
- Inability to resolve conflict: “We fight about the same issues but never get anywhere.
- Sexual problems: “Our sex life is not what it used to be.”
- Lack of quality time: “Our life revolves around the kids or work. There’s not enough we-time.”
- Financial stress: “We don’t agree on how to save or spend our money.”
- Relationship transition conflicts: “We’re not on the same page about moving in together, getting married or having a baby.”
So, how does couples therapy work? We all meet together, and I help each of you communicate what’s causing you pain and what’s missing in the relationship. Then I will teach you specific skills to express what you are feeling and needing, WITHOUT COMPLAINING or CRITICIZING your partner. We’ll also work on ways to work through conflicts, repair relationship wounds, and build a closer, more intimate relationship.
As a result, you should learn how to:
- Communicate more effectively.
- Solve problems as a team.
- “Fight fair.”
- Build trust.
- Recover from a relationship crisis.
- Improve your sex life.
- Have more fun together.
- Create a shared vision for your future.
Occasionally, your partner will not be interested in participating in these sessions. If this applies to you, there is still hope. I encourage you to come in by yourself to discuss ways to improve your relationship. It is often the case that if you can adjust how your perceive your partner and how you communicate, your mate will likely change in response.
So, call today and take the first step toward building a happy and healthy relationship.